{turning point}

Remember that day that David deployed?  If you are reading this, I'm sure you read that first heart-breaking post of mine.  My heart was literally breaking and I was falling apart.  Hands down, the hardest day of my life thus far.  I was riding in the car with Tina, my neighbor, on base today when she told me of her first encounter of David.  She was walking outside when she noticed those "dreaded green bags".  Those bags only come out for one reason, they are leaving for a long time.  Instantly her heart began to break because she knows first hand what we were about to endure.  She told me of the everlasting hug that David gave her.  She knows them well, the hug that is needed for a scared and nervous man about to go to war.  She said it was so tight and so long.  It broke my heart so much to hear that and tears began to form in my eyes.  She assured him that she would watch after me and that she and her family would take care of my while he was gone.

I can't imagine that hug.  It's different from the hugs that he and I give each other, but so heart breaking if you know the emotions behind it.  I was thinking about David's emotional and mental switch that David had to make.  From being comfy and at home with his loved ones, to fighting war face to face.  He was scared and nervous before he left, who wouldn't be?  I can't even imagine that feeling in the pit of my stomach.  What will it take to completely mentally switch?  When will he be comfortable with war?  Will it be at his first encounter of an IED?  His first reason to call in an air strike?  The sound of a machine gun rattling in the top of his vehicle?  The first time he has to use his weapon?  I know nothing that he has done for work, so I don't even know when the switch happened.  I'm sure it has by now.

For him and all the other men and women who are deployed for the first time in a war zone, I pray.  I pray for them and their families.  That they will be able to make that switch and become confident in their abilities and the abilities of those who lead them.  I pray for safety and strength.  God Bless all of them in their daily endeavors.  I hope they know that they are in our daily thoughts and prayers.

**David Update**

I have only had brief contact with David today.  He got my "one month down" package today.  I gave him a camera to record his time in Afghanistan.  All I know is that he was up super early this morning and was back in his room, but now done working, at 0100 his time.  His days have become long and his is doing things that he said need to happen.  (Whatever that means...)  

David, I'm praying for you in particular.  I hope that you have the strength to handle whatever is thrown your way, and if not, that you are strong enough to ask for help.  

I'm here waiting for you and thinking of you constantly.

I love you David.